Mr. Jello Award

As a teenager, my friends and I used the term "Jello" to describe a dumbass or gutless person.  Over time it evolved into just meaning dumb, brain dead, etc.  

One day Chris or Pat Fagan found the guy at left, pinned a Jello logo on him, and gave him to whichever one of us had been a Jello.  He was then passed around as an "award" whenever one of us did something dumb.  The recipient held unto him until someone else did something worthy of the award.

Mr. Jello disappeared ages ago, but his photo lives on.  After a friend told me of something he had done that was "deserving of the Mr. Jello award," I thought it might be fun to resurrect the award.

Bryan Iverson
October, 2007

Bryan is one of my regular golf partners. None of us are great golfers, but we have fun.

Bryan had a tough shot on a difficult hole, and proclaimed (I'm paraphrasing) "If I miss this shot, I'm destroying this club."

Well, Bryan didn't hit the shot the way he wanted, so true to his word, he destroyed the club. Unfortunately, when he swung it at the golf cart, the shaft hit the post that holds up the roof of the cart, shattered, and wrapped around the pole hitting Bryan in the hand with the head of the club.

The result, a bloody and broken hand, and a trip to the Emergency Room. He has three pins in the hand, and is looking at six months in the cast.

The best part? His wife's comment upon getting a call from the emergency room: "wasn't he golfing?"

I'm not expecting an acceptance speech from Byran, he is having a hard time typing with one hand.

Brian Bugsch
October, 2006

Brian coaches his daughter's Under-12 soccer team in the Sacramento area.  The team had been struggling, the frustration level was rising.  Let's have Brian take us through the action, shall we...

"Jade’s team got thumped 6-0.  After playing solid in the first half, the opponents got two quick goals and the girls just threw in the towel and gave up. I had one of those Southwest commercial moments (deserving of the Mr. Jello award) as in abject frustration I lost my mind and yelled out 'get the fucking ball!' as, for no apparent reason the noise decibel level dropped to zero when I said it and I could be heard by everyone.  I had to apologize to the other team and my parents."

Nice work Brian!

Brian e-mailed his acceptance speech...

"Thanks for the award.  I’d like to thank Rob Lambeth, my mentor. Without his shining example, I could have never achieved the heights of humiliation to reach my goal of winning this award."